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How To STOP
Self-Sabotage
Once And For All
"Resistance by definition is self-sabotage" - Steven Pressfield
Here's a powerful way to overcome the saboteur within.
Tom O'Connor
Each of us is capable of achieving extraordinary things in our lives. But what people achieve is usually far less than their potential.
Why? Because almost all of use are listening to the wrong voice.
The voice of the saboteur.
The path to freedom is not found in answers but in questions. Questions control our focus which in turn determine our results (or lack thereof).
So are you asking yourself the right questions?
And are you getting each week at asking really good questions?
For most the answer is NO.
One of the reasons why is because most folks are poor listeners. Asking great questions starts with being a good listener.
Earlier this week I shared a NEW framework that is very useful to help you dramatically elevate your listening skills, which in turn gives you the information one needs to ask better questions.
“The questions we are asking ourselves are as profoundly important as a question we might ask another person.”
And by far, the person who is most affected by the questions you ask daily is YOU.
So are you asking yourself questions that promote strength or weakness? Are you feeding or starving the inner saboteur?
Let's find out. Answer me this:
- Are you a good friend to yourself?
- Do you ask questions that energise and inspire you to take action, daily?
- Or do you ask questions that keep your fearful and stuck?
For many it’s the latter.
So what’s the fix? We need to take back control of how we are using our FOCUS, which is determined by the questions you ask yourself.
Here's a quick method to help you. We're going take an AUDIT of the questions you ask yourself. Over to Master Trainer Michael Breen to share more:
Starting right now...
- Start to pay closer attention to your internal communication and questions you ask yourself.
- Notice how you are talking to yourself. Are you a friend to yourself, or are you repeating a pattern of relating to yourself that is unhelpful.
- Write it down your observations.
- At a 3 days review and identify the most common questions and patterns that are directing your attention on day by day basis.
Once you've done that, begin to challenge your own assertions. Question your fears, doubt the doubts you have about your own capabilities. Use the ideas shared here to unpack the invisible forces that are shaping and guiding your own relationship with yourself.
Then ask yourself "What would be a more useful question?" Write down ten better questions you could use to redirect your focus and catalyse your resourcefulness.
For example, ask yourself:
- What have I assumed is so? Is it REALLY? (or is it just a story I’ve bought into?)
- When did I start thinking this way?
- How do I know (whatever the thought is) is true? Would anyone disagree with me, if so, why? What are they seeing that I am not?
- What am I missing? What am I not paying attention to?
- What am I making this mean? Now that I know what I know … am I willing to consider a different perspective so I can have what I really want?
- Who do I know of or know about that would never think this way. Why?
- What’s a more interesting or useful way to look at this (or talk to myself)?
- What’s one thing I can do today to improve my inner dialogue?
Change how you talk to yourself and everything else in your life is going to change. No longer will you doubt that are you worthy, or let fear stop you. You suddenly find yourself free to simply go for what you truly want.
Your sense of inner-confidence grows. And that confidence acts like an attractor for other people to be their best selves around you.
When you learn how to ask powerful questions of yourself and others ... when you discover how to generate great questions that provoke transformation intentionally your ability to create deep changes in yourself and those around you becomes far easier. You stop needing to use techniques and instead can create transformation using just questions. It's an incredibly powerful skill to acquire.
If you want to discover the quickest, simplest and most powerful way to learn how to ask great questions, also known as killer questions, consistently and predictably then click here to check out our very time limted sale on Question Lab.
To your success,
Tom
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